My Life

Mourning Sunshine

All changes, even the most longed for, have their melancholy; for what we leave behind us is a part of ourselves; we must die to one life before we can enter another. ~ Anatole France

Self Acceptance is an agreement with yourself to appreciate, validate and support who you are right now, even those parts you’d like to change.Look at yourself in the mirror.  Take a moment to love and accept the person you see looking back at you. – www.innerspace.org.uk

Going through change has me pondering life and what is to come. We leave behind us what we want to purge from our lives, and open doors in front of us hoping for better. Our lives, and the process of change, brings about a sense of mourning. The goal is not to get trapped in a cycle where we revert back into what we tried so hard to let go.

I have found that I am a person who hangs on, rather tightly. I think I am afraid of change… that ominous unknown. I fear that I am afraid. I know what I need to change, I have recognized the negativity within me, but the real “act” of change has me bewildered. When I started this project mid January, I only thought about what I am thankful for just prior to my writing it out. Now, I find myself thinking about it all day long. Now, I find myself waiting for reasons to be thankful. It’s almost like a scavenger hunt in positivity.

I have been told that this wasn’t going to be an easy project, and I can agree. I have been told that there will be days when I can only find mundane to be thankful for, but to push forward none the less. Today, definitely is not one of those days. I have been in deep thought, deep conversation and feeling very comfortable with who I am at this moment; tomorrow however, the story line may change.

Today, I am thankful for simple moments of self acceptance.

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One thought on “Mourning Sunshine

  1. Beautiful……

    Thing is……we will all change one way or another……

    You can let life’s circumstances change you for better or for worse…….

    OR you can plan your changes for the better……..

    Even it’s a simple change. Like changing your view of something awful to the view that there is a learning that is held within it…….

    Even that simple change can improve life dramatically……….

    I love your post…….keep up the good work…….

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