We left off yesterday’s blog with a basic understanding of “romance.” Now that I have an understanding of what is romantic, it helps me formulate my 5 year goals. I took parts of my night last night to think about romantic gestures with my husband. I was surprised to acknowledge them, and the fact that I actually enjoyed the memories.
- I will begin to notice romantic gestures, taking a moment to process and store them in my memory bank.
- I will begin to examine and understand why physical contact makes me uncomfortable.
- I will learn to enjoy kissing, cuddling, etc. more.
During the spring, after we first moved in together, my husband made a point of stopping a long the flower stands off of West Valley Highway to pick bunches of wild flowers. He’s always been good with picking wild flowers over something archaic like roses. That spring and summer I had beautiful flowers each week that sat on our dining table. It’s memories like these that allow me to see the romance in our relationship.
I know that touching, kissing, cuddling, hand holding are all aspects of being romantic with your partner. I have grown uncomfortable as I’ve gotten older with many listed above. I don’t know why it’s become such an unwanted thing. I don’t like kissing, but I used to. I used to like curling up, bodies close, and kissing. Now, just the mere thought kind of makes my stomach curdle. The only thing I can think of is because of my use of sex in place of love or romance. Now, it’s almost like I’m testing myself.
All seem pretty attainable, it’s just going to take practice to make habit.