Year in Review – As you reflect back on the happenings of 2011, what were your high points and what were your low points? What do you notice as you look back on the year as a whole?
Highlights of this year, 2011, are varied. I will do my best to jot down those that stand out the most.
What do I notice when I look back over the last year as a whole? I notice changes in me, and in those around me. The choices I am making for myself have improved who I have in my life as well. Changes is key, and I will continue to change throughout the coming year.
I had the opportunity to go against the grain and work a position that I have never done before. I was a Video Game Tester. Although contracted briefly, it was one of the more excited experiences of my life. I thoroughly enjoyed it. I wish I could have stayed longer, but, I wasn’t able to prove myself as a game tester and my contract was pulled. It’s ok, it was an eye opening experience. And for that, I am truly grateful.
I left my husband, finally. After living three years in discomfort and depression, I made my mind up to leave. It was hard, I won’t lie. It was hard on him, my son and myself. I wish things could have remained amicable with him, I wish we could still be the friends we were since 1988; prior to marriage. But, alas, it is another lesson learned. What I primarily learned about myself in leaving him, was that I am strong. I am stronger than I give myself credit for. I did it. I made a move to change my life.
My relationship with my son has become stronger, despite some of the negative things I’ve posted about recently. I can only respect his anger and frustration over the divorce. I can only encourage him healthier ways to express those angry feelings. But, in the end, he’s 15 and still tells me he loves me… a lot.. and in front of his friends. I can only cherish that.
I have started the mending process with my relationship with my mom, and other family members. This is a HUGE step for me. I am thankful I took the steps to start counseling, and even more thankful for the lessons learned in counseling. Without their support, without their unconditional love, I am grateful for the tools I’ve learned to work on better relationships.
Finally, I am going to say that I am a positive for the year 2011. I have learned a lot about myself. I have learned my boundaries with others, and how to express them in a healthy manner. I have learned so much about myself, that I never thought possible. I can only grow from here.
I would have to say the worst highlight for me this year has been my lay offs, a few bad choices, and the day I was pretty suicidal. I had forgotten my own strength, my own survival skills. If I didn’t have my son, I probably would have ended it all.