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Aged some, but still moving on.

© Regan Vacknitz 2011

I am going to be divorced, finally, a year after leaving him. I am thankful, and filled with gratitude, that this day has finally come. He’s put me, and my son, through the wringer. What I once thought could be a amicable separation turned into a nasty warfare. So much that I don’t want to hash it out any further than I already have on my blog. It has taken a year to move forward and head into a positive direction. But that path, however, is one that has been filled with anger, tear, broken feelings and frustration.

I am dating someone, I have been with him since January. Most days, things are wonderful; the both of us are learning to love through hurt. He has been hurt and jaded, just as I have. It’s a whole new learning process for the two of us. He’s not used to a woman who can, and does, communicate. He’s not used to a woman who treats him remarkably, and with that he panics and gets passive aggressive. It’s a work in progress, like all things in life. If it weren’t a work in progress, love wouldn’t be worth the struggle.

I started work, and man… it is exhilarating to be working again. I mean, I can literally feel the weight lift up off my shoulders. I am still alarmed, waiting… always waiting. I have forgotten how to tap into myself and find the confidence needed to live life, love others and trust in a higher power. 

Speaking of a higher power, I have felt the pull and urge to start going back to church. Here are some words to leave you with.

I have lost 75 pounds since leaving my ex. This is the first time in ten or so years I have been under 300.


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