I think I finally found my place in life. I firmly believe I have finally found my “home” to plant roots into. I just want to state for the record, I am very thankful for my abuser, I would never have learned to appreciate who I am fully. I love me and it took many years to get here.
I’m loving my job, coworkers, even the patients (even the violent/angry ones who came back and personally apologized for their behavior). My coworkers are so appreciative, complimentary, and really respect what I bring to the clinic. I’ve heard, “She’s kind of awesome, think we’ll keep her!”, so many times in the last month of me being there, it makes a gal just bloat with pride. We have a Kudos board in the break room, one of my co-workers posted a kudos to me.
I just… feel welcome and wanted. I don’t see leaving this company anytime soon. I can honestly see myself growing and moving up within. I can see going back to school; they offer tuition reimbursement. I can finally finish my degree.
I love the town. In the next year I will be moving to the town I work in. It has a huge CoOp market, it’s very hippie, granola like. They have art walks, movies in the park, great food locations and the people are just incredible. It reminds me a lot of Olympia, WA… and I LOVED living there. I can’t wait to relocate.
I am working on repairing my credit. I have it mapped out in payments from now until the new year. At that time, my credit should be pretty damn clean. I am hoping I can look into a rent to own situation. I want some land and tiny place to build into my own.
My son is finally coming into his own. He’s so happy being home with me. He loves his job. He is changing into an incredible young man. I am more than happy to have him stay as long as he needs until he’s fully sufficient and has pride in himself as well.
I’m really, just happy. Finally, inside my soul to my outer shell, content and happy.
The only things I need to make it come to full circle:
A group of friends. I have made a couple of female friends here. I can only go up from this point. I miss my friends back home. I miss girls day at Olive Garden. I miss the connections. It is another aspect of me I would like to fulfill.
I would love to find a right place to feel fully involved in spiritually. I need something open faith and spiritually. I would love to find something that I can meditate and learn from. I feel that portion of my life is lacking. I need to feel full of spirit. I am just not connecting with a Christian following though. I feel that being content comes from internal springs and personal experiences, growths, etc.
I ‘m not worried about weight loss. I am not worried about that. I firmly believe that once my inner realm is flowing smoothly, my outer realm will follow suit.